flea

Yes, it's child birthday party season again. Dillo's went off relatively easily - the child is 3 after all, so social complexities are limited. But Casper is turning 6 and for the first time is wanting and expecting a REAL birthday party.

(Recap: 2: one friend for ice cream cake; 3: family from nanny share for pizza and cake; 4: cupcakes to day care, grandparents in town for family dinner; 5: cupcakes to school, new neighbors with kids invited over for kid playtime and cupcakes.)

I've got a plan. We're doing fairies. It's to be 10-12 am on the Saturday after her birthday (2 weeks from now). I have acquired the Klutz book on making little wire-and-bead fairies, and need to look at it in more detail (practice) and possibly acquire some additional fairy-making supplies at Michael's. The plan is to do a craft time of making the fairies (dining room table), then have some playtime outside with the fairies, and then have lunch and cake outside. I was thinking of making tea sandwiches on the tiny Pepperidge Farm bread, and having "tea" to drink. (Fairies can have tea parties, right?) I'd like to hang the mesh bed canopy in a tree and have blankets underneath as a fairy bower. Not sure if that will work given our actual trees - I plan to delegate the dilemma to mr. flea.

So far, so good.

The complication is who to invite. There is who Casper wants to invite, then there's who I feel like we owe an invitation due to our social connections and the role of reciprocity. Casper's interested in inviting the first 5 only.

Penny: Casper's best friend. No question.
Shannon: Casper's 3rd grade friend from after school last year, who appears to be attending a different school this year. As I do not know her last name nor how to contact her, I think we cannot invite her.
Siena: In Casper's class and after school, and we are friends with her parents. The only dilemma here is not inviting her twin brother, but I think they are old enough that he will understand the concept of an all-girl fairy party and not want to attend. I can explain that to his parents, and if they have any sense they will have him have a boy playdate.
Allison: Lives three houses down, in Casper's class and after school, dad is the principal. Casper wants to invite her, although they are not especially close and there was some issue about Casper not being invited to Allison's birthday party.
Dynasty: In Casper's class both last year and this year, and in after school. Luckily I met her aunt at the open house, and she works at the Tae Kwan Do school, so I have a way to get in touch with her family (I want to avoid passing out invites in class, as potentially hurtful.)
Eliza: Lives a street over, in Casper's class, Casper went to her birthday party and they've had her over for a lot of playdates. They don't seem to have much in common, and Casper doesn't care about inviting her, but I think given how many overtures her parents have made to us we have to invite her.
Hannah and Owen: Neighbors. Hannah is 5, but very tomboyish, and Casper and she don't have much in common. But we spend a lot of time with them. I think if I explain to Mary that we're having a girly party with her classmates it will be fine, and they will not feel excluded.
Spencer and Ruby: Ditto, except Spencer is 4 (and Ruby is 1). I will need to talk to Gretchen also.
Evelyn: In Casper's class, lives in our neighborhood, but they were in Brazil for 9 months & just got back so we haven't had much social contact with them lately. Is good friends with Allison and Eliza, though, and they are all in class together, so they will talk.
Katie Sue: In Casper's class and after school, though she and Casper don't seem to be especially friends. Know the parents in the 'nod in the hallways' sort of way. Could probably not invite her. But if I invite all the other upper middle class girls from Casper's class, she would be the only one left out.

ARGH. My size goal is 4-6 girls. I hate this whole 'being human with social connections' thing.

I am feeling overwhelmed at work today - I have had to put off things for several weeks, and can't seem to get caught up - so what am I obsessing about? Whether or not to sign Casper up for 4 year old soccer, and if so, which league, and is it too late, and what are the social implications of each. No, this is not calming me down.

I m idiot.

I also spent a lot of the weekend socializing with parents and observing children socializing, and would love to be able to write up a long insightful post about it (also, the differences between Durham and Chapel Hill). Unfortunately I have been deserted by time, eloquence and insight, so I will simply say that I am a social moron and even while sitting there telling myself that I MUST strike up conversation with nice-looking person, and the only thing required is to ask, "Which child is yours?", I simply cannot. However, Casper seems to be in a phase of social ease and great creativity, such that after 2 hours spent playing with new people at the School playground playdate, she left with me saying, "Bye! I'm being captured by my evil witch mommy!" and on the way home said, "I like my Name School."