the culture wars...

[flea]

In addition to their ongoing anti-feminist articles about young women wanting to stay home with children, the New York Times also has had repeated articles about clashes between people with children and people without children. Today's instalment is here: http://www.nytimes.com/2005/11/09/national/09bakery.html?8hpib

My response is well-covered by Bitch, PhD in this essay (http://bitchphd.blogspot.com/2005/04/moms-at-work-over-there.html) and can be summed up this way: children are part of society. Yes, parents should encourage them to be well-behaved in public, and should not take one-year-olds to Michelin 3-star restaurants. But a casual neighborhood cafe at brunch time or early evening? Give me a break.

Comments

[cashmerepett.livejournal.com]

In my view, children have different abilities from adults. Their different abilities - in terms of self-control - mean we should grant them more leeway than we grant adults.

Yes--this. It took me FOREVER to get over the feeling of mortification that I felt when Owen started fussing in public. But I think the unrealistic expectation of some childless people is that the kids should act like miniature adults. Which is ridiculous.

I certainly wouldn't fault the owner of the restaurant for asking parents to control their children. But perhaps pointing out specific behavior WHILE IT'S OCCURRING is more effective than painting all parents and children with the same wide brush. Insulting the parents of ALL children and making them feel unwelcome because of the normal behavior of their children is wrong.

Not all childlike behavior is disruptive to diners or staff and it shouldn't be held up as such.