Someone asked, what do you, as a mother, worry about?
I have worried that:
I was starving my baby and I'd never get the hang of this.
I would go insane due to the constant demands of an infant.
I would never find adequate child care.
I would never be able to pay for adequate child care.
I would go insane due to sleep deprivation.
I would not be able to pump enough milk to feed my infant while I was at work.
I would project my own emotional issues onto my child.
Have you noticed a trend here? I have very few worries about Casper herself. This is the big one:
I worry that the lovely person she is developing into will be unhappy in this world.
(And this in itself is partly a projection of my own emotional issues).
Relatedly, the thing that has been most disappointing to me as a parent? My mother has not proven to be of any use at all as an emotional support during difficult times, nor as a source of simple advice. We are trapped in a cycle where any conversation about parenting instantly devolves into suspicion of criticism and hidden motives. I know my mother loves Casper (and me), but I really wanted to feel that she supported me in my mothering.
I have worried that:
I was starving my baby and I'd never get the hang of this.
I would go insane due to the constant demands of an infant.
I would never find adequate child care.
I would never be able to pay for adequate child care.
I would go insane due to sleep deprivation.
I would not be able to pump enough milk to feed my infant while I was at work.
I would project my own emotional issues onto my child.
Have you noticed a trend here? I have very few worries about Casper herself. This is the big one:
I worry that the lovely person she is developing into will be unhappy in this world.
(And this in itself is partly a projection of my own emotional issues).
Relatedly, the thing that has been most disappointing to me as a parent? My mother has not proven to be of any use at all as an emotional support during difficult times, nor as a source of simple advice. We are trapped in a cycle where any conversation about parenting instantly devolves into suspicion of criticism and hidden motives. I know my mother loves Casper (and me), but I really wanted to feel that she supported me in my mothering.
no subject
Date: 2005-11-02 02:12 am (UTC)