religion and the family

[flea]

So, Casper has mentioned the Bible, and she points out Jesus in the big stained glass window of the church on our walk home (I said yes, Jesus was a wise teacher who lived a long time ago), and she asks me to sing a song I don't know about Jesus and children all over the world. (This song seems to be fairly mainstream - 2 of the 3 mainline-protestant raised friends who were present when I mentioned it broke into song together.) Clearly the nanny does some casual mention of religion, above and beyond the usual secularized Christmas/Easter.

I was raised in an atheist home until the age of 10, at which point my parents divorced and my mother mandated attendance at Episcopal church. I went on condition that I be allowed to sing in the choir (we had an excellent music director from Harvard) and under no circumstances go to Sunday School or Youth Group. This situation endured until I was 13 and we moved, at which point I became a Christmas-and-Easter Episcopalian. Since graduating high school I've been to various churches occasionally for the purposes of anthropology or attending other people's events. I do not believe in God. I feel that one's own religious beliefs and choices are very private, and I am uncomfortable with much discussion of religion in public arenas.

But I am a secular Christian - Christian religious holidays are observed by me in their secular incarnations, and I appreciate the traditions, music, and history of churches, with a particular prejeudice towards the Anglican/Episcopalian. I also have read the entire New Testament (for a class in high school) and have a decent grasp on the Old (due to a good child's Bible stories book and my study of Mediterranean ancient history) and have had occasion to be amused that I, the atheist in the room, may know the Bible better than the people who attend church or temple.

I like the idea of attending church for the sense of community activity, but can't even bring myself to join the local Unitarian Church because I feel that their spiritual community, though broad, is not so broad as to embrace my rejection of belief, plus they have cheesy "inclusive lyrics" music. The local Temple's preschool is high on the list for Casper for age 3, however - it's 2 blocks away, good, you don't have to be Jewish, and I like the idea of her being exposed to traditional Jewish holidays in an age-appropriate way.

Parents, especially fellow non- or low-believers, how have you/do you plan to educate your children about religion? Can anyone recommend children's books on religion that describe or illustrate traditions or stories and aren't really cheesy or proselytizing - i.e. that would pass my critical test both for artistic merit and squeamishness about overt religion? I like Madeline L'Engle's The Sphinix at Dawn, for example, but it's not simple enough for my toddler.

Comments

[veejane.livejournal.com]

(This song seems to be fairly mainstream - 2 of the 3 mainline-protestant raised friends who were present when I mentioned it broke into song together.)

Was it "Jesus loves me, this I know, 'cause my Skippy tells me so..."?

I knew the commercial for peanut butter way before I knew it was a religious song, and now they are stuck together in my brain, like peanut butter in unfortunate places.

private

I was just discussing this with somebody the other week, about how in our corner of the country, religion is a private thing, and mentioning it casually in conversation, as some local celebrities do, is as rude and weird as if they were describing their underpants.

I have no advice regarding good Biblical stories that aren't anvilicious, especially not for that young an age. And, personally, I would find it unbelieveably creepy if my nanny were indoctrinating my kid without, like, checking with me first.

[casperflea.livejournal.com]

I think the nanny is unaware that she's doing it - she doesn't even realize that people might be uncomfortable with these minor religious mentions. Note that 2 of the 5 families who have at any time been involved in the nanny-share are Jewish! Eli's parents were a little uncomfortable with the Christmas carols playing, and asked that the nanny restrict them to secular carols. She was kind of surprised, and was worried about whether she should get him a Christmas present. She's well meaning and completely doesn't get it.

[veejane.livejournal.com]

Did they spell out J E W I S H in really big letters?

I thought you lived in a college town, hon. Can you enroll her in a comparative religions class?