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If things go as planned, we could be living in Athens for a major chunk of time. I mean, we bought a house; in some ways it would be really bad if we moved before 5-8 years are up. In 5 years Casper will be 10 and Dillo will be 7, and they'll have lived their entire lives in the South.

Growing up, mostly in New England, the South was a foreign country to me, and I was as guilty as anyone of stereotyping Southerners. The mere existence of Jesse Helms didn't exactly help matters. Now I've lived here coming up on 7 years and it's still not home to me, though I have learned a lot. Athens is a lot more Southern than Durham, so I've got new learning to do. But home to me is still a place with actual winter, and wood stoves, and oil heat, and Italian-Americans and Irish-Americans.

And, of course, Southerners stereotype Northerners, too. This was a cheesy little piece of cliche in the student paper this am (about a baseball player who spent the summer in Cape Cod):

"And few things will make a person tougher than surviving a summer of Northern hospitality.

"The people are a lot more friendly in the South, I will say that," Poythress said with a laugh. "The food was a little different and stuff like that, but I was around baseball players every second of the day so it was fine."

For Poythress, it also didn't help that the North couldn't find any sweet tea, either.

"The very first time I asked for sweet tea, I knew they wouldn't have it, somebody just looked at me like I was crazy and said, 'We have sugar' and I said 'That's fine,'" he said."

I wonder if I'll be like my grandparents, who moved to Cincinnati in 1946, but vacationed on Cape Cod the whole time, and as soon as my grandfather retired in the mid 1970s moved back to the Cape for good. I also wonder if my kids will be like my father, who moved to Cincinnati as an infant, left after medical school, but eventually moved back.

What about you? Is where you were raised still "home"?
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I can't believe it's only 11:30; I feel like I've gotten so much done today. These are the benefits of clearing out items that have been haunting the office for weeks. And having no meetings or appointments for a whole 2 hours in a row! Of course, there is a new list of haunts to tackle now.

But first...

We met with Miss Rosa yesterday for Casper's first official school conference. It was weird, because Rose isn't very articulate in English, and clearly this sort of formal sit-down makes her uncomfortable. I would love to be able to talk about Casper and child development and what she's like with someone who is both her caregiver and is knowledgeable about the field and able to express herself clearly, but so far, we haven't had that combination. So, a little frustrating for me.

What Rosa had to say about Casper is sort of the same thing we've heard from every caregiver about her - she's an easy child to take care of. Rosa framed it as, "She's quiet, she's respectful, she's careful." I guess this is who she is, when she's out in the world. It's funny how different my own picture of her is. Quiet, this bossy child who will wag her finger at me after I scold her saying, "Don't do that to me again!"? Careful, the girl who kicked her mother on Sunday, and throws things? I am glad, in a way, that she can sometimes be a normal hellion two year old at home, since she clearly doesn't feel free to be that way in public. And I'm kind of sad that she's so good and restrained in public, at such a young age. I feel as though I was a very socially constrained child, and it was a hindrance to me and my development. I am sure that someone's mother is going, "I wish my child was getting reports that she is good and quiet and respectful, instead of the report that she bit Johnny, again, and was too loud and pushy, and rips books," but in my family we could stand a little more loud and pushy. Especially at 2, so it's not repressed and then bursts out at less opportune times, like 14, or 33.

Some (much?) of it is shyness, which Casper comes by honestly, probaby both genetically and by observation of her parents. She gets shy when asked direct questions by Miss Rosa and Miss Jenny, and is slow to answer (they think she's not a talker. Not a talker!!!). She won't take her turn to sing at circle time, although heaven knows she learns all the songs and was singing along like an opera diva with mr. flea in the bath last night. But she's been in this class nearly 6 months now; how long can it take for her to loosen up? (Well, judging by me, she may never, so there's that. I can be shy with people I've associated with daily for years.)

My worries for her going forward are how this shyness will play out as she transitions to her new classroom next month (in 2 weeks, actually), and how the armadillo's birth will change her feeling of comfort within the family. I want her to be bold and at home in the world, not just in the embrance of her family. And I don't want the new baby to make her feel any less warmly embraced. But who she is is who she is; I don't know that I can do much to shape her.

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