my online community

[flea]

I'm still amazed by how involved I am in my invisible friends. I do sometimes dream of people at b.org, and when I read, my immediate reactions sometimes are in terms of people I've never met. For example, I was reading the new Gourmet, and there was an article by Perri Klass about teaching her son to cook before a 2-week campout with his 9th grade class so he'd have something valuable to contribute. With some added thoughts about maturity, tools for being an adult, etc. And all I could think of was jonquil's son - and I've never met jonquil, let alone her son. But there you are.

I think, for me, my online community replaces books, to some extent. I often felt as a child that the characters in books I enjoyed were my friends, or at least my friendly acquaintances. I was sometimes more interested in them than in actual people whom I knew. This is still the case, except with online people. And I often don't want to know them (you) any better than I do - I like our friendliness to be a bit distant and polite; I have no desire to IM and email you all. Perhaps I have intimacy issues, you say? Well, there is that.

Comments

[dxmachina.livejournal.com]

I've thought the same thing about my online life partly replacing novels and such. I certainly now spend a lot of the time that I used to spend reading books reading (and posting on) b.org and LJ instead. It's almost like a real-life soap opera, with tens of different story lines to follow.

[veejane.livejournal.com]

Now see, my social use of the internet has replaced phone calls. Or, made me able to keep up with people I would otherwise have lost entirely.

[jonquil.livejournal.com]

Awww, thanks. He helped his daddy cook supper last night, btw.

[fatoudust.livejournal.com]

My current online life replaced gaming. Online. Really it was only a bandwidth shift -- I had less, so I had to participate in slower content. Hmm. I should maybe look into this 'other world' thing people keep going on about.

But yeah, I know what you mean. For me it's really been great, making moving several times and living in the boondocks much easier. I never have to feel like I lose this particular group of friends.

At one point I wanted to pursue closer (non-board) communications & friendships and such, but I concluded that I'm just not very good at that sort of thing. Suppose I just prefer this sort of venue.

[cofax7]

Like DX, I've found time online is replacing reading. Which I miss. But online life isn't that passive, and so I go back and forth on it.

But yeah, I'm with you on having things make me think of my online friends. Or aquaintances.

[makaidiver.livejournal.com]

Yes! Yes! Yes!

This too is the reason why I get so upset when a gang of people are really mean to someone else at b.org. Only I don't exactly know why the two are related. It might have something to do with my not seeing the people as disposable, and I think when there's a nasty kerfuffle, some people think that way. "They can leave, we don't care, this is OUR community." When to me, they are all the community; the loss of one is a loss to all.

Sorry, don't mean to hijack your post. Just, I'm a dufus and I've been thinking about this alot and still haven't figured it the words for it.

[mearagrrl.livejournal.com]

Me too, online is replacing reading. To a certain extent--there are still times I go read at B&N for many hours, and since I'm on planes so much, I do a lot of reading then, but....evenings? Weekends? A lot more onlineness=a lot less reading books.

[fufaraw]

"I often felt as a child that the characters in books I enjoyed were my friends, or at least my friendly acquaintances. I was sometimes more interested in them than in actual people whom I knew. This is still the case, except with online people. And I often don't want to know them (you) any better than I do - I like our friendliness to be a bit distant and polite; I have no desire to IM and email you all. Perhaps I have intimacy issues, you say? Well, there is that."

Yes. I understand completely.

I've loved meeting the people I have met, but it's always a conscious gathering of and expenditure of extravert energy that I don't ordinarily have to spend. Wonderful, exhilarating, but also draining. Worth it, definitely, but not too often.