North and South

[flea]

If things go as planned, we could be living in Athens for a major chunk of time. I mean, we bought a house; in some ways it would be really bad if we moved before 5-8 years are up. In 5 years Casper will be 10 and Dillo will be 7, and they'll have lived their entire lives in the South.

Growing up, mostly in New England, the South was a foreign country to me, and I was as guilty as anyone of stereotyping Southerners. The mere existence of Jesse Helms didn't exactly help matters. Now I've lived here coming up on 7 years and it's still not home to me, though I have learned a lot. Athens is a lot more Southern than Durham, so I've got new learning to do. But home to me is still a place with actual winter, and wood stoves, and oil heat, and Italian-Americans and Irish-Americans.

And, of course, Southerners stereotype Northerners, too. This was a cheesy little piece of cliche in the student paper this am (about a baseball player who spent the summer in Cape Cod):

"And few things will make a person tougher than surviving a summer of Northern hospitality.

"The people are a lot more friendly in the South, I will say that," Poythress said with a laugh. "The food was a little different and stuff like that, but I was around baseball players every second of the day so it was fine."

For Poythress, it also didn't help that the North couldn't find any sweet tea, either.

"The very first time I asked for sweet tea, I knew they wouldn't have it, somebody just looked at me like I was crazy and said, 'We have sugar' and I said 'That's fine,'" he said."

I wonder if I'll be like my grandparents, who moved to Cincinnati in 1946, but vacationed on Cape Cod the whole time, and as soon as my grandfather retired in the mid 1970s moved back to the Cape for good. I also wonder if my kids will be like my father, who moved to Cincinnati as an infant, left after medical school, but eventually moved back.

What about you? Is where you were raised still "home"?

Comments

[fabby.livejournal.com]

I was raised in the South (born in GA, raised mostly in SC) and though there are things I remember fondly, I do not think of it as home. I've been in CA for longer than I was in the South (moved out here at 16 and am now 38) and it is officially home to me at this point. My family still lives in the South so I'm back somewhat frequently and guess I'd consider it a second home. My politics and lifestyle make CA a much more comfortable fit.

[(Anonymous)]

I grew up in Maryland, sort of a no-man's land between north and south (northern charm and southern efficiency, so they say), and I've lived in Boston and now Athens. Both have felt familiar, but not like home. The only time I felt totally out of place was the 2 years I lived in the upper mid west. We're still not settled permanently yet, though, so who knows where our kids will think of as home. My older one is 5 and has lived in 3 states.

[veejane.livejournal.com]

"Northern hospitality"! Ha -- the whole point of the Cape league is that the kids are boarded for free with local volunteer families. (And gotten local summer jobs, though most players quit them eventually.) Northern friendliness, probably not, but that's exactly what hospitality is.

I knew a woman from Pennsylvania who was a hugging maniac. She avowed that everyone in Pennsylvania hugs and we are the weirdoes who don't.

[larisa57.livejournal.com]

Hmm. I'd say that, if we're talking about geographical place and not a particular building, then the northeast feels like home. I think it's pretty much that, with the good and the bad, I understand it. Like, when I was in New Orleans, it took me forever to realize that it was polite for cashiers to make casual conversation with each customer. In NY, that's rude -- it holds up the line.

Or maybe it's kind of about how I fit in. Like, I know what my labels are -- female, Jewish, Jerseyan, upper-middle class, educated, white. And in the northeast, I've got a fairly good idea of how other people see those labels, and how they place me in relation to everyone else. In the south, not only was I suddenly give a new label -- Yankee -- that I had no idea how to deal with, I also found out that several of my old labels -- female and Jewish -- meant totally different things, and that another one -- white -- was considered kind of iffy.

[mearagrrl.livejournal.com]

I'm still figuring out this whole PNW thing. But the midwest? Nahhhh. I mean, I get it, and there's things I value about it, but go back? Hells no. Chicago, maybe. But that's a little different than the where I came from part. And that's why I could go back there.

The east coast is now where I've spent more time, and all my adult time. And that's where I "get it".

[vwbug.livejournal.com]

I was born in the Chicago 'burbs, lived there till I was 12, then moved to rural Minnesota for 10 years, then back to the Chicago 'burbs. I've been in Boston for 6 1/2 years.

I do not ever plan to return to the midwest. I like Chicago. I could live there again. But, this feels like home.

[(Anonymous)]

Where I was raised is still very much my home. It makes sense to me, and after spending 5 of the last 7 years in Athens I've only managed to get to "doesn't routinely make fool of self" status. I miss everything about home and hope that some day I will get back there.

Cobblestone

[sail-aweigh.livejournal.com]

It's the majorly ironic thing in my life that I ended up back where I began. One of the reasons I joined the Navy was to get the heck out of Dodge (or Madison, WI as the case actually is.) I left in 1978 and swore I would never go back. Aaaand, in 1996 I moved back. At this point I'm quite content with here and find I prefer it over many places I have been. And I have no particular desire to leave as long as I'm working. Once I retire, all bets are off. I'm finding me a place where I don't have to worry about snow, probably Florida as it's more affordable than California.

[cofax7]

I will always consider myself a New Englander, but I've now spent about half my life outside of New England. So... I dunno.

I miss the autumn in New England, but not so much the shoveling. I suspect that what New England is now isn't much like what I remember, frankly.