flea: (Default)
flea ([personal profile] flea) wrote2004-06-28 07:54 am

Life too hard, send help

Horrible horrible night. As expected, our baby is not one of those babies who see 10 minutes of the cry it out method and then sleep all night. No, she is one of those babies who cry for an hour and a half, twice, and also randomly every twenty minutes for the rest of the night. I have a headache from gritting my teeth all night, despite earplugs, and the baby looks horrible this morning, as if she'd cried all night. Oh, wait, she had. And all she wanted to do was cling to me and I had to go to work and she cried more and I feel so abusive and like she's got Stockholm Syndrome.

My father is being a shit, and I think he is going to try and sell grandmother's house out from under us because he thinks it is a bad idea for us to buy it. Because he thinks he is the smartest person in the world. Little shit.

My aunt, and namesake, has had a recurrance and general metastasis of her cancer and is expected to live 6 months. I need to write to her, but what to say? "Hello, so sorry to hear you are dying."

Never mind the riddle of the nanny taxes.

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

[identity profile] cindyamb.livejournal.com 2004-06-28 12:31 pm (UTC)(link)
I am so sorry about your aunt, flea. I think you say, "Hello, I love you." She's alive until she is dead, and love matters an awful lot.

I am far from a diplomat. I'd be tempted to tell my father exactly what he was being. I don't recommend that, though. Are you pre-approved for a mortgage? If you can get pre-approved, would that help convince your father?

I'm sorry about your gorgeous one's sleep issues, too. I hope this passes quickly for you. Are you feeding her when she wakes?

[identity profile] dxmachina.livejournal.com 2004-06-28 01:19 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm so sorry about your aunt. Tell her about her great niece, and include some pictures. That should be cheering in what are probably hard times for her.

As to your father, it may take some work, but if you can show him that it isn't a bad idea, and how much the house really means to you, then maybe he'll come around.

Hugs, sweetie.

[identity profile] veejane.livejournal.com 2004-06-28 01:52 pm (UTC)(link)
One likes to think one's parental units actively wish one well in one's enterprises, even if they disagree with one. There are a hundred ways in which we could be supported and encouraged (and not in a financial way); we're not.

It's both angry-making and depressing. The "reunion" in September is going to be a very unpleasant experience, what with the simmering cloud of resentment that is brewing.

[identity profile] jesseh.livejournal.com 2004-06-28 01:51 pm (UTC)(link)
God forbid you should be able to deal with one thing at a time, huh? Sorry.

One time I was babysitting for a nine month old who cried the entire time, no matter what I did. It was horrible. So, although not a parent, I can empathize. AND the baby is now a grown woman, or at least in college, and has turned out just fine.

[identity profile] cindyamb.livejournal.com 2004-06-28 05:40 pm (UTC)(link)
This is the overwhelming bit of new parenthood (well, regular old parenthood too, but it's most disconcerting when you're a newbie). The other challenges and problems have no respect for your complete lifestyle change. So-important-and-noisy-about-it-person doesn't give a shit what's going on in your life. And your life seldom seems to cut you the kind of slack you need to get used to So-important-and-noisy-about-it-person.

You call the bank about your statement? The baby cries. You call the utility company about a bill? The baby cries. You get a call from your best friend, in tears over her honestly serious problem? The baby cries. You're so tired you want to drop? The baby cries. All. Freaking. Night.

It is wonderful, don't get me wrong, but it's really hard and it's too bad you can't spend the first year in seclusion from the world and all its demands, except for when you choose to venture out.

[identity profile] luluminion.livejournal.com 2004-06-28 02:28 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm so sorry this is all happening to you at once. I wish there was something I could do! (It seems like there *should* be something, since I'm not very far away, but I know that there probably isn't.)

I wish you tons of luck and ~ma with Baby Flea, as well as your dad and the house stuff. As for your aunt, I would definitely write to her, and not worry so much about what to say. Once you get past the first couple of sentences, you can fill the letter with all the stuff you would normally write. For the intro, some variation of "I am so sorry to hear of your news. I'm thinking of you a great deal right now, and I hope that if there is anything I can do, you'll let me know." Or something.

Hope the rest of oyur week is an improvement on today! *hug*

[identity profile] forodwaith.livejournal.com 2004-06-28 05:09 pm (UTC)(link)
Arggh, flea. So sorry to hear about your aunt, and the rest of the crap the universe is piling on you right now.

I have nothing practical to add except that, one way or the other, Casper will be fine. I hope tonight goes better.