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HB to me
I am 34 today.
I was thinking the other day about accomplishments. Something I am really proud of is my summa cum laude graduation from college - I worked hard, earned it, and it's there to be recognized forever. (And I only found out at graduation rehearsal - it was a small enough school that they did a full rehearsed walk-through, and the cheering at the summas, first announced there, was spontaneous and heartfelt; I was so surprised and proud and loving my colleagues for being so proud of me.)
I haven't accomplished much since. I have a husband and two children, but they aren't accomplishments - they're people. I got a master's degree and passed comprehensive exams for a PhD and have published a few articles, but somehow those don't feel like real accomplishments the way finishing the PhD would have.
Need to think about what I want to accomplish in the rest of my life.
I was thinking the other day about accomplishments. Something I am really proud of is my summa cum laude graduation from college - I worked hard, earned it, and it's there to be recognized forever. (And I only found out at graduation rehearsal - it was a small enough school that they did a full rehearsed walk-through, and the cheering at the summas, first announced there, was spontaneous and heartfelt; I was so surprised and proud and loving my colleagues for being so proud of me.)
I haven't accomplished much since. I have a husband and two children, but they aren't accomplishments - they're people. I got a master's degree and passed comprehensive exams for a PhD and have published a few articles, but somehow those don't feel like real accomplishments the way finishing the PhD would have.
Need to think about what I want to accomplish in the rest of my life.
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Would the work you did toward your PhD be reapplicable to something else that you'd like to do?
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I understand the tenor of your post, however, I must point out that having and raising good solid people, without succumbing to the occasional but siren urge to put them out for the wolves to find, and maintaining an open and rewarding relationship with another adult human, all while suffering sleep deprivation, are indeed accomplishments. Large, big accomplishments, requiring enormous stores of energy, innovation, improvisation, forethought, and the willingness and ability to go to Plan B at a moment's notice.
If you wish to add academic and professional accomplishments to those, then all good luck to you. You're a star, already.
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Need to think about what I want to accomplish in the rest of my life.
I know the feeling.
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Your accomplishments for the coming decades can include: raising children so that they do not turn out to be serial killers. I think that would be pretty neat. If they hit 25 and can balance their checkbooks, so much the better!
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Number B, I know of this "but it's not a PhD!" angst of which you speak; and I know you know I know of it as I'm pretty sure we've grumbled about it before. It's stupidly hard to let go of the academic measures of achievement when one has trained oneself so very well in valuing them, and it's even harder when you're surrounded by the overachieving twits every day. For whatever it's worth, I think of you as terrifically accomplished: wise, and shrewdly smart, and a fantastic writer (so what if it's in blog form and not peer-reviewed?), and one of those people who matters to those around them. Plus the rugrats, who aren't an accomplishment in a notches-on-your-belt sense, but who are amazing creatures and not serial killers at all (yet). Plus (as I keep telling myself) mid-thirties means plenty of time left for all that other crap.
And in sum, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
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(I'm older than you. How did I not know that?)
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Which, incidentally, is the same as my dad's. But you're much younger than him, don't worry.
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Also, what arliss and gchick said.