I don't think not giving gifts is stiffing -- I mean, everyone has so much crap in their lives anyhow, giving people more crap seems to me like an imposition, almost, unless you know it's something they can actually use.

I do recognize this is not the majority opinion.

I also send out a lot of holiday cards, with a nice letter and a picture of the kids, because I figure that's what friends and family really care about: how are we doing, and how big are the children?